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Thread: 10 Seconds 2 Heaven

  1. #1
     Murder The Mainstream Nohbody's Avatar
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    10 Seconds 2 Heaven

    ...head in the clouds

    hours from heaven...


    i nailed butterflies to my belly, they flutter when i'm weak
    in love with the curve of your lips, but fade when you speak
    erased weeks in bed scratching my back on the posts
    every notch a memory of the angst that it hosts
    those ghost grow more chatty as time goes
    exposing what's most missed. then dissipates . . . slow
    exit stage left
    necklace rest next to your pic; aggravated with patience
    cant wait to kiss the angels face or make its re-acquaintance
    anxious hands, your vision always plays on my nerves
    jagged words wrote in cursed manuscripts are a blur
    love letters stir emotions, you’re an ocean of precious evils
    I take caution ‘n walk around you like stepping through needles
    people search their whole lives to find the kind of love we had
    that’s why I broke knuckles fighting and let blood sign the cast
    perhaps its been so long, ill never find the path to go back
    so if we never lock eyes again, I just want you to know that
    I fucking love you. . . more then these words can describe
    If you'd search my dreams you'd know I'm hurting inside
    and how the night terrors rise to show your face again
    stop motion animation placed you in those frames again
    reoccurring theme of that faithful day my ship crashed
    fingers inches away as you slowly sink on your back
    and your image distorts within the rippled water

    then you were gone
    along with everything I ever lived for or wanted
    and so goes the song
    “if i can turn back time”



    i did
    then came back my dear
    my promise is this time I'm just going to sit here
    anchor set, just above the coordinates where you died
    i swear, I feel you close again every time I close my eyes
    reciting a poem, key in tow to unlock your heart
    because now we both know. . even death wont keep us apart
    as the clouds come down, waves crash against the bow
    water breach starboard

    ten seconds to heaven now

    and well ride there together to meet God on a fiery cloud

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    An armed man is a citizen,
    An unarmed man is a victim
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  2. #2

    Re: 10 Seconds 2 Heaven

    gdamn this was dope. that opening line is straight fire. imagery throughout takes you there as a reader. crazy ending.

    is this a topical verse from elsewhere that you shared as an OM? cuz this kinda reads like competition writing.

    either way, good shit mang i ain’t know you got down like this.

    pz

  3. #3
    I Rose from Concrete 🖤🥀 NoNun2's Avatar
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    Re: 10 Seconds 2 Heaven

    That was beautiful - what an awesome read… I almost heard someone’s voice reading it! Dope as fuck!!!!
    +~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+
    As much as I hallucinate and see him…
    I’m willing to take that chance

  4. #4
     Murder The Mainstream Nohbody's Avatar
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    Re: 10 Seconds 2 Heaven

    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Hallows View Post
    gdamn this was dope. that opening line is straight fire. imagery throughout takes you there as a reader. crazy ending.

    is this a topical verse from elsewhere that you shared as an OM? cuz this kinda reads like competition writing.

    either way, good shit mang i ain’t know you got down like this.

    pz
    thanks bro, this was a post i dropped on another site that went dead back in august lol. Just figured id post here, wasnt actually expecting to get feedback on it haha... thanks guys

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    An armed man is a citizen,
    An unarmed man is a victim
    .

  5. #5

    Re: 10 Seconds 2 Heaven

    i nailed butterflies to my belly, they flutter when i'm weak
    sick intro

    love letters stir emotions, you’re an ocean of precious evils
    I take caution ‘n walk around you like stepping through needles
    THESE LINES STOOD OUT, wish you kept up with more wording like this
    overall it was ok, I feel you need to use more concept imaginative wording like the bits I poked out

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