Anger Management

[Akira Son Bio]

Anger Management

I don’t like you
I don’t like the way you walk
Or the way you talk
I don’t like what you do
Face it, I don’t like you

Nor do I like the way you smile
The way you move, your clothing style
Your hair, your physical appearance
All of it is sure ignorance

I don’t like you
I don’t like how you stand there
Smoking, polluting the air
How you laugh just annoys me
I don’t like what you seem to be

And it seems to me that your some
Fucking punk who think he’s hardcore
Thinks he is better than me, please
Your just a straight bitch, nothing more

I don’t like you
Your body size is just repulsive
Your nothing close to attractive
Fuck it, your ugly in the worst way
I hate you, there’s nothing more to say

I don’t like you, your family, friends
Associates, even your shitty crew
But you know what is really sad
I don’t even know you ………

[Tourniquet]

Ahh, I love the twist at the end of this. And indeed, it is a twist. A self realization maybe? So much distaste for this person whom you hate.. and yet you know not who this person is. Well, obviously you know who they are, but not Who they are... If that makes sense.
Too much hatred in this World, and all too often its because that which is hated, is misunderstood.. or just different.
In the end, we are all the same, remember that. Nice write.

[Akira Son Bio]

Thanks for the feedback

[Spoken]

wow some strong hate in this piece. makes me all pissy just reading it.

you did a good job getting your feelings across in this piece, they were pretty damn clear. your vocab coudl use some work, and stretch your lines out some too. other then that flow was aliright

~Tera~
DONT HATE

[Kenoras]

man u need sum counceling, gud rhyme tho.

[Bruklor]

Hmmm...well, the title was a bit off the topic. You never led to managing your anger, so why would you title it something that implies some sort of actual management to your anger?

It was very simple, very simple. Vocabulary, scheme, everything...and that was I think made this good.

I don’t agree with everyone saying how this had a lot of emotion...errmm
Well, yes, this piece had emotion, but not a lot.

“Fucking punk who think he’s hardcore
Thinks he is better than me, please
Your just a straight bitch, nothing more”

Errmm...don’t do that, it was more like you were battling (very badly I might add) in the part I just quoted. It really didn’t fit into the piece.

Not to bad overall. Keep it up.

[DthsMissingAngel]

Good drop. Structure was nice. Could use some better vocab. Structure was good, and u got ur point out right away. Nice ending, totally can relate. Flow was good. Lot of emotion, mainly hate. Overall good job. Keep droppin. Much respect.

[.:LadySage:.]

I agree with self, it did seem like a poor attempt of a battle verse in some parts
I think you tried to relate the title in a way thats not relevant to the piece
The rhyme was simple, structure was ok, but the content was weak, it didnt appeal to me much
but it made me think of how people subconsciously hate; judge before they get to know a person, i dont know if that was what you was trying to get out ( i don't think it was)
but overall this was an ok piece
keep elevatin

[Akira Son Bio]

Originally posted by .:LadySage:.
but it made me think of how people subconsciously hate; judge before they get to know a person

Yeah, that was the point I was trying to get across, with the twist at the ending. As for the title, I wanted to use something that wouldn't give the twist away. By the way, there was no means of trying to make this seem like a battle verse in anyway, lol, just someone hating another person cause they are different.

Thanks for the feedback.

[Civilized Rebel]

Personally, I think this would have been great if it had some real good punchlines in it, and give that battle verse appeal to it.

Anyway... you ever listen to the song "Strange Famous Mullet Remover" by Sage Francis? It's a good song. In one point of the song this guy is all talking "And I don't like anybody touching me. If any of you homos touch me... I'll kill you." Well I got the feeling that the tone that guy was speaking in, was the entire tone of this peice. Just imagining some guy slowly talking with anger in his voice and a pointed finger.

Thing is, I just want to know why you hate me so much. Especially since you don't know me.

~Shalom~