Week 1: Professor Frost VS. PAVONIA[Pavonia Wins]

[Unfukwitable]

PAV swing wit aggression, cuz i'm 'Playing Hooky' ruthless...
'Head shots' leave Professors Apple Red on a desk, like good students!!

-Everything tied in and made sense but it was really that creative or effective, Ive seen plenty of bars like this and the wording wasnt crisp enough to make this bar stand out.

[Joe Boston]

Yeah gotta agree @PAVONIA the punch itself was a direct punch but the whole concept of the finisher on how u displayed the wording took away from impact of the punch. Props on showing

[PAVONIA]

This was aight. I think if u keep it more simple and come with fresher concepts u could be real dope homie.

Thanks KS. Imma keep at it....

Props on the constructive feedback @Joe Boston @UnFuckWitAble

[Meks.]

Wasn't bad here, think the wording threw me a little bit and u may have tried to get 2 complex with it but not bad.

[PAVONIA]

Wasn't bad here, think the wording threw me a little bit and u may have tried to get 2 complex with it but not bad.

Thanks man...really appropriate the feedback homie.
I was going for the haymaker punchline lol i definitely tried to go kore complex then just working it properly.

Thanks

[Barcotic]

ya the most I ever do is capitalize the first letters of concepts, no need for italics and/or quotations. that shit was for long bar

decent attempt on a played ish concept, just wasn't there for me but u def have potential

[Greedy]

You tied the setup to the punch well. The punch itself however, didn't have much impact. But good bar.

[Smog]

Think this coulda been done better without the like but still a pretty cool jab IMO..

[Flying Carcass]

Thanks man...really appropriate the feedback homie.
I was going for the haymaker punchline lol i definitely tried to go kore complex then just working it properly.

Thanks

Agreed

[Tic]

Not too keen on this one, tbh. The wording was awkward and it just didn't feel harsh to me.

[PAVONIA]

Props on all the feed fellas...I'll definitely take the info y'all said and apply it. Thanks

[Aero]

PAV swing wit aggression, cuz i'm 'Playing Hooky' ruthless...
'Head shots' leave Professors Apple Red on a desk, like good students!!

Did a lot with this... Professor apple red is cool

[Flying Carcass]

Pavonia really good punch best shit I've seen all day your concept was nice and flowed well with the wordin an setup, good shit rtf on my battle vs Toretto