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Thread: Found Dead

  1. #1

    Found Dead

    Found Dead
    ------------------------------------------------------
    A Crime Story


    Part I- Death

    I seen the body mangled in the street, life strangled in defeat
    someone pushed control-alt-delete, now hes an angel in a sheet
    no angle was discreet, everyones eyes on me deranged and scared
    the whole block stared including the bum i gave some change with care
    we were a strange pair, silhouetted by the nights moonlight glow
    the only sound heard was natures hiphop, the breeze's tuned tight flow
    some goons might know the pleasure in watching life's last lonely measure
    to unlock five bullets to the chest to steal lifes only treasure
    "it's a phony gesture" people told me, its your own damnation
    but i had to put a stop to this crime lord, be my hoods salvation

    Part II: The Night Before


    its almost midnight, i just finished drinking wine talking with peers
    but now i needed some time alone, so now im walking the pier
    balking my fears around my friends, but now im giving in
    it's time to risk leaving this world i am now living in
    im getting in some trouble, tomorrow this guy wants to rumble
    cuz i stumbled on this man selling drugs, killing my boys struggle
    my dawgs life crumbled to rubble, now hes falling through the cracks
    due to smack, he begged on his knees and blew dudes for sacks
    i knew the tracks in his arms werent due to what we loved in music
    but he would choose it, use it, got his kid to finally abuse it
    my fuse lit, his dealer hit everyone down to the paper boy
    the biker, storekeeper, and even a mother drugs raped for joy
    mistaked for toys, the mothers children poked themselves playing doctor
    dad found out, left on domestic violence cuz he had to sock her
    teens shoved this shit in lockers, hoop stars said "fuck the game
    fuck the fame from sports when this shit made girls still suck the same"
    this dealers luck's insane, he has everyone straight hooked on this shit
    he's cooked enough hits, and its time a man looked to end it

    Part III: The Morning After

    the moon showed its crescent, its almost time to give my lesson
    my blessin to society, He arrived with his smiff n' wesson
    no one was restin, this guy sat there with a smirk on his face
    then the hood turned against me, they began to work in disgrace
    my knees jerked in this place, a stone hit my head,"take this dummy!"
    the storeowner laughed then said, " a man needs to make his money"
    my face caked n runny with blood i screamed, "Stop i love you!"
    "enough fool, You cant stop me kid, learn that im the one above you"

    .....

    .....

    five shots hit my chest, my body fell hard cracking the ground
    the hood all stood silent, they were actually backing this clown
    my body hacking around, my soul began to float over my form
    the stars went out, a chilling night became a stove.. too warm
    eyes swarmed my figure, like it was plagued with diseases
    my dawg recognized me as he stood and said, "Oh Jesus"




    I Told You I would Came Back To Help My Children In A Form U Wouldnt Guess

    I Have Granted My Sacrifice One Again To Lead You Out Of Sin

    Just Remember I still Love U, Even Though U Arent Coming Back This Moment With The Others In The Rapture. You Too Can Still Be Saved.

    Heed This Message

    Drugs Is Satans Form On Earth

    *the drug dealer is now in custody and on death row for murder*
    Last edited by Fracture; December 22nd, 2005 at 01:03 PM

  2. #2

  3. #3

  4. #4
    NONCENTZ AKA WORD~PERFECT noncentz's Avatar
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    Okay Wordplay Is Great It Throws The Topic Off A Lil The Context Of The Word Kind Of Looses The Reader.you Focused To Much On Wordplay And Not Enough On Actual Emmotion Of The Peace But It Was Still A Nice Peace I Liked It .
    to love something,is to die for it ,if you do, your a martyr , but these days music is morbid, false carters ..prohet's for prophet no lie, look how our last martyr was crucified. to put it in it symplicity, you aint true...you wouldnt sacrifice a few dollars for authenticity..

  5. #5
    thanks

    uppin for feed

  6. #6
    rise.

    leave links

  7. #7
    Banned
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    Okay Wordplay Is Great It Throws The Topic Off A Lil The Context Of The Word Kind Of Looses The Reader.But It Was Still A Nice Peace

  8. #8
    very smoothe delivery, i liked it alot,

  9. #9
    Banned
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    thsi was good...liked the topic and the lay out of this peice...strucutre was good flow was smooth and rhymes were..imagery was here..iight vocab...medocr..simple in places and complex in sum..overall this was a good drop..i was feelin it..peace

  10. #10
    thanks for feed everybody. If u want something on the comedy side, check out my OM "Its Bigger Than Yours...". Im writing a three new OMs now and will try and post them today. Hopefully one of them will make the HOF . Nominate if you think their worthy.

    uppin feed.

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